Dear Mr. Rebel,

You've made mistakes, so have I. I've always been there to support you, even when the mistakes you make frustrate me. You come across to everyone as a free sprit, as the rebel. The one who always wants to get away. I've never seen you like that. You don't mean to hurt the people you love by the things you've done, but I can't help hoping that one day you will be a little bit wiser. I don't want you to change who you are, I just want you to know the difference between right and wrong. I can't help you with that. I can't be your voice of reason anymore. That breaks my heart.

Honestly, I don't know why you want me. I'm so different from you. Adventure sometimes scares me, I would rather sit with a good book, and I love coffee. I can't climb up the face of the mountain without being terrified, I'm safest on the ground. Why did I catch your eye? You could have anyone you want, there are people waiting in line. I'm nothing special. I've just ever been your friend.

We've been through a lot together. We've helped so many people together. To say that you need to learn some lessons without me is hard. Frankly, I have to learn some lessons, too. I'm used to having people around to help me decide where I should go, what I should do, and who I should be. It's time for me to learn how to live with who I am. We both have some stuff to work on, some baggage to get rid of.

I think I want to be with you--I know I miss you when you're not with me--but I want to make sure that I'm missing YOU and not just missing the comfort you bring. I'm waiting for you to grow up and become the man that I KNOW is in there. I'm waiting until I can be confident on my own. I know I've hurt you by saying no, by guarding our friendship. I don't want to hurt you, but I know we both need to change to be healthy.

Waiting may mean that we both become strangers to one another. I hope that's not what happens, but we both will change. It this means that we will never get to even try to be more than friends, then ok. I want you to be happy. Whatever happens, believe that I will always love you. Maybe not in a romantic way, but I will always be here to encourage, comfort, and serve you any way that I can. I hope you find what you're looking for. I hope you find truth.

Love,

Waiting